Identities: Hetero, Cis Woman, Asian, Pacific Islander


“I am a straight female who identifies as both Asian and Pacific Islander. At the beginning of the pandemic I felt anxious, especially when New York was at its peak. I lost a relative to the virus and it was scariest then. Everyone is scared of getting it or what could happen if they got it. I felt more anxious than my parents during this time. I’m naturally a homebody so I didn’t mind being at home during quarantine. My parents are worried, though they are more willing to go out, but I go because of their old age. I am very focused on practicing the correct protocol to minimize my exposure to any potential risk, while it's not necessarily at the forefront of their minds. My experience of the pandemic has been a lot luckier than some people. I don’t think I received any backlash or racism. The Black Lives Matter movement has also been prevalent in the lives of many people. I’ve been educating a parent on anti-racism and it’s going well. To cope with stress of what is happening around me, I am baking more. I also bought painting supplies a week ago and started painting. I morphed the thought of quarantine into having extra time to do things I enjoy.” (Aspen) (Pseudonym used at Interviewee’s Request) ...

Identities: Biracial Filipina/White, Queer, (Cis-)Female, and 2nd Generation.

CW: R*pe, Trauma

“I didn’t think being at my parent’s house during quarantine would affect me so deeply. I’m trying to forget what happened, but it’s become hard to focus. Hotlines have long waiting lines because of COVID, and I’m scared to speak to friends because it means that I have to face it too. I’m scared my family might hear me talking to them, and I don’t want their shame or judgment.

It’s been years since the actual event, but I’ve never stopped and created space for myself to understand what happened… I was r*ped when I was in high school, and seeing remnants of my old room where it happened and photos of them made me fall apart. It hurts more to know that this was someone I once considered my closest friend. They were always the one to be there for me and came up with dumb adventures to cheer me up. In retrospect, that all feels predatory.

It’s hard to explain why you don’t want to sit next to someone when they drink orange juice. How do you casually say, “My r*pist always smelled like oranges because it was their favorite scent, so the smell makes me feel sick.” But now, I really like the smell of oranges, and that feels like a big victory even if I still have panic attacks from triggers sometimes. I’m really proud of myself for being able to share this, because it’s my first step in a long overdue healing process.” (Anonymous) ...

Identities: 1.5 Gen, Chinese/Filipina, Cis Woman

“While I was growing up, I remember playing with this white butterfly, calling it “bei yah” in Hokkien. My mother is half Chinese and half Filipino, and my father is fully Chinese, but we all lived in the Philippines together. After moving to America, I would still see the white butterfly. I used to believe that the same one followed from the Philippines to where I live now. It was a sign of comfort and familiarity in what felt like a foreign place at the time.

I grew up in a predominantly rich, white area of NY. I used to envy the privileges many people had at school that I didn’t have as an immigrant— parents were incredibly involved in their education, helping them every step of the way to ensure that they got into good colleges. There was this expectation that everyone goes to a private school out of state. At the time, I was immature, and was upset with my parents for not helping me the same way. I was worried that I wouldn’t match up to my friends who got accepted into Ivy League schools after deciding to attend Hunter for my scholarship. My parents worked every day as nurses, and I ended up taking on more responsibility, figuring things out by myself, and learning important life skills. But, I know now that it’s important to be grateful for what you have and to work hard and be practical to achieve the things you want in life.” (Anonymous) ...

Identities: 2nd Gen, Muslim, Bengali, Cis Woman, Brooklyn

COVID has been a very tragic time for my family. We’ve lost family members, work, education, and opportunities. We’ve gone through two holidays (Eid) without the rest of our family. However, in the midst of it all, I am definitely grateful to have a home, to have food on the table, to have my family with me during this time. We were able to spend an entire month fasting in our homes during Ramadan, a time where we would often be scrambling to finish our finals and come back from school just in time for iftar (breaking fast). It was a time of reflection, and a blessing to be home during the holiest month in our year, and gave me a sense of peace in the craziness of this world. I have my own ways of coping, from resting more, spending longer times in prayer, disconnecting from social media, spending time with my family and friends, cooking, and trying to accomplish one task at a time instead of overwhelming myself. I hope this semester is a fulfilling one for all of us, one where we learn healthy habits and come out of with a greater appreciation of being in one’s company. (Anonymous) ...