Get Involved with HCAP!
If you’re a current Hunter College student, there are many ways to get involved in HCAP! These opportunities are open to all students. Click on the buttons below to see more about how to get involved:
Events Classes Internships Connect with HCAP Staff HCAP Leaders
“Following the deaths of George Floyd, Breonna Taylor and Ahmaud Arbery, many were seen protesting across the United States to fight for justice. Over the years, I have grown to realize that there remains a certain extent of rejection surrounding the Black Lives Matter movement in the Asian American community. This is a reflection piece about the anti-Blackness that exists in Asian American communities and about how I helped educate my mother on the topic.”
-Samuel Dilawari. Excerpt from HCAP’s Asian American and CUNY Student Narratives Zine
To read more or view the entire zine, go to https://huntercap.org/hcap-leaders-asian-american-and-cuny-student-narratives-zine/ or scan the QR code.
LINK IN BIO
“A large proportion of Hunter College students are students of color who are first in their family to go to college and/or come from immigrant communities. First generation immigrant college students generally have more responsibilities than other students and are in need of support that are unique to their experiences. Being a first generation immigrant college student myself, I felt the need to support these students in documenting and sharing their perspectives and experiences, which often are not heard in mainstream media. So for my narrative project, I compiled the stories of Hunter College students during the past few months, focusing on how their identities have shaped those experiences. I hope our narratives could be used to inform the Hunter College community in better understanding the unique experiences shared among first generation students during the past few months.” -Leora Zhang. Excerpt from HCAP’s Asian American and CUNY Student Narratives Zine
To read more or view the entire zine, go to https://huntercap.org/hcap-leaders-asian-american-and-cuny-student-narratives-zine/ or scan the QR code.
[LINK IN BIO]
“I found my interest in baking and cooking during this pandemic. I like to do it when I’m stressed from classes. If you’d like, take this time to discover some interests that you have never thought of before.
No matter what your situation is, please know that you are in the middle of the pandemic. Making decisions during a time of uncertainty can be difficult, and it is totally okay to be unsure. You can be unsure about school, about family, and anything in life, because we are all unsure. If you feel stressed, reach out to someone that you trust in, and always remember that the Counseling and Wellness Services is available. You can learn more at: http://www.hunter.cuny.edu/cws” -Hanteng Li. Excerpt from HCAP’s Asian American and CUNY Student Narratives Zine
To read more or view the entire zine, go to https://huntercap.org/hcap-leaders-asian-american-and-cuny-student-narratives-zine/ or scan the QR code.
[LINK IN BIO]
"In the beginning of quarantine, one of my family members tested positive for coronavirus. About three days later, I developed coronavirus symptoms and had to self-quarantine for about 2 weeks. At first, I was hesitant to email my professors about the situation since I had very little symptoms that affect my academic performance. However, I later developed worse symptoms and I had to face the fact that I need to prioritize my health rather than my academics. To
my luck, all of my professors were understanding and gave me flexible deadlines" -Sharlene Daba-ay. Excerpt from HCAP’s Asian American and CUNY Student Narratives Zine
To read more or view the entire zine, go to https://huntercap.org/hcap-leaders-asian-american-and-cuny-student-narratives-zine/ or scan the QR code.
[LINK IN BIO]
Have you always wanted to write about your life but didn’t know where to begin? Would you benefit from a creative writing class that would help improve your overall reading, speaking, writing, and listening skills in university courses?
Join writer Bushra Rehman for a series of creative writing workshops in which we will explore our relationship to this vibrant, resilient metropolis we may call home. Together, we will generate new writing, learn techniques for overcoming writing blocks and celebrate our creativity. Each workshop will include a series of short readings and generative writing prompts as well as time to share our writing.
This free, non-credit, workshop series is open to all current Hunter College and BMCC students. Students who identify as Asian American, Asian Diasporic, BIPOC, and/or from immigrant families are encouraged to apply.
This class is capped at 25, so apply by December 22nd at bit.ly/winterwriting21 [LINK IN BIO]
HCAP would like to introduce our next upcoming segment which highlights our Asian American and CUNY Student Narratives Zine.
In Summer 2020, seven HCAP Leaders met over a series of Zoom sessions to reflect on their experiences navigating distance learning, the pandemic and growing movements for racial justice. These discussions led to a digital zine project to document the stories of Asian American and other CUNY students in this time.
Each HCAP Leader developed and contributed a narrative piece, writing about issues they care deeply about. We hope this project helps other students know they are not alone and inspires others to share their own stories.
Over the next few weeks, we will post excerpts from this zine project. To view the full zine, visit HCAP’s website: huntercap.org
Please stay tuned for more!
Identities: Asian American/Chinese American, adoptee, and bisexual woman.
For my mental health, not going on social media much is key. Focusing on just yourself and positive things help. I’ve been going on Instagram less and it definitely gives me more peace of mind. Instagram is the number one anxiety inducing app and is really performative. There’s also humble bragging like if someone lives in a bigger house and is in quarantine, they will have stories. I will be comparing myself to a small part of their whole picture. But you never know what’s going on in anyone’s mental health.
Identities: Chinese American, Woman
“These past months of quarantining by myself have led to a lot of ups and downs, but I am grateful that the universe has forced me to slow down and take time to reflect on what is most important to me in life. I really needed it. As I hear about friends who have lost a family member, I realized how lucky I am that my family and I are safe. Although I never got to meet their family, it hurts so much to see them hurting. I have come to realize that I often take the wonderful people in my life for granted. I bookmarked this pandemic in my mind, so I don’t forget it's loved ones and relationships that matter above everything else in life. Lately, I’ve been journaling more to get all my thoughts and feelings on paper, and I LOVE IT! Last note: we will make it through all of this together”
(Anonymous)
Identities: South Asian American, cis-gendered female, questioning sexuality (bi-curious)
“Home is the worst place”.
For Nika, her home environment is “toxic to her identity.” Even though she grew up in America, she feels she has to match the values and mannerisms of the community that her parents were a part of. “I think I'm one thing, and they think I shouldn't be that thing; I shouldn't wear this, I shouldn't do that; I should focus less on my own success and more on my family.” There is dissociation between her identity as a young woman and as a member of the AAPI community, who she feels actively “stops her from expressing herself.” Nika is still “looking for a community to fit into” whose values match her own. Having to be quarantined has been very difficult for Nika’s mental health, especially as she tries to advocate for the BIPOC community, but is faced with the prejudice of her family. However, advocating for others’ rights and educating herself and those around her gives Nika great joy and a sense of purpose. Some other things Nika is doing to stay happy is maintaining her relationship with her friends and significant other, working, and looking at memes. (Pseudonym used at Interviewee’s Request)
Identities: Korean, Bisexual
Re: Black Lives Matter and AAPI Communities: “I feel anxious and hopeful at the same time. I don't feel ready, and I don't quite understand what my place in the movement should look like. I'm looking towards the people I admire who have been doing abolitionist and transformative justice work for years as a model, but it feels like I'm playing catch up. I understand, more acutely than ever, how much more I need to learn and how much more work I need to do. And in the end, this larger movement and desire for social/class/gender liberation is simply a question of dedication, and for me there is little question about it.
In terms of mental health, I've always struggled with depression and maybe less anxiety, but I've found with the beginning of the protests in solidarity with George Floyd, that I felt more nausea and anxiety-aligned physical symptoms. At the peak of this, I surprised myself to find that praying and returning to a religion I have not touched since I was young soothed me and steadied my heart rate. Which has countless contradictions in and of itself, I realize.” (Anonymous)
Identities: Muslim, South Asian, student, writer
Quarantine has been terrible but it has its good days, according to Holly. During this time she has been focusing on her relationships and her identity as an Asian American. Her view of the Asian American community is that it is a “very honor based [society] and the pressures it places on the children [can] rob them of feeling unconditional love.” Familial and societal expectations have caused Holly to think about her relationships using a lens of power: “if I can’t be of use, then I’m very scared of my place [in others’ lives].” Holly feels pressure to fit in to the “perfect Asian mold,” often feeling like a “fraud” in relation to her identities: daughter, friend, writer, student. She tries to keep herself happy and motivated by letting go of expectations and being productive, focusing on her own interests and hobbies. One of her biggest struggles in her mental health journey has been growing her emotional vocabulary. Holly shares that she has been relying on the emotional wheel from the Gottman Institute to better identify and express her feelings during stressful situations. (Pseudonym Used at Interviewee’s Request)
Identities: 1st gen, Chinese-American, cis-female, and heterosexual
From being out 6-7 days a week to only once a week has been a rather tough shift in routine. The first two weeks were the most difficult in this time of uncertainty and stress. What really helped me was being able to spend more time cooking with my grandma. She often tells me she wants to make food with me, but having a free day was rare since I would be out all the time. I felt bad constantly saying she would have to wait, despite her telling me it was fine and my work comes first. During this quarantine period, I've helped my grandma make the food she's been wanting to make for months now. Seeing her excitement while preparing the food and after it is finished has been the greatest source of happiness for me. I am extremely fortunate and grateful that my loved ones are healthy and I can spend this time with them, as I know some cannot. There are people hurting in various ways and I hope they are able to find strength and happiness at this time, in whichever way they can. We are resilient and I hope it will translate to whatever happens when this is over. (Anonymous)
Identities: Asian, Hong Konger, Gay, Cis Man
“I identify as Asian, Hong Konger, Gay, and Cis male. During this pandemic, I have felt a bit angry, hopeless, and disappointed. The government is handling the pandemic terribly and it seems like they are taking advantage of it for political agenda. The world is going terribly and there is a distrust of the government and people, especially under the Trump administration. Early in the pandemic, people will look at you differently if you wear a mask or just because you are Asian. I didn't experience it myself, but I see it in the news. I see anti-blackness within Asian communities where the Black Lives Matter movement is met with criticism [by other Asians]. There is a lot of racism being exposed from all races and perspectives, it is a societal problem.
There is also a lack of connection with people, especially friends. I feel contained because of the environment. I can’t go far, and I am trapped in my neighborhood. It is difficult to see friends or hang out with them because people don’t live near you. I have been taking summer classes, watching YouTube (specifically Stephanie Soo), and exercising more than usual. Staying active and getting close to nature has been a way for me to cope and surround myself with positivity during this time.” (Anonymous)
Identities: Hetero, Cis Woman, Asian, Pacific Islander
“I am a straight female who identifies as both Asian and Pacific Islander. At the beginning of the pandemic I felt anxious, especially when New York was at its peak. I lost a relative to the virus and it was scariest then. Everyone is scared of getting it or what could happen if they got it. I felt more anxious than my parents during this time. I’m naturally a homebody so I didn’t mind being at home during quarantine. My parents are worried, though they are more willing to go out, but I go because of their old age. I am very focused on practicing the correct protocol to minimize my exposure to any potential risk, while it's not necessarily at the forefront of their minds. My experience of the pandemic has been a lot luckier than some people. I don’t think I received any backlash or racism. The Black Lives Matter movement has also been prevalent in the lives of many people. I’ve been educating a parent on anti-racism and it’s going well. To cope with stress of what is happening around me, I am baking more. I also bought painting supplies a week ago and started painting. I morphed the thought of quarantine into having extra time to do things I enjoy.” (Aspen) (Pseudonym used at Interviewee’s Request)
Identities: Biracial Filipina/White, Queer, (Cis-)Female, and 2nd Generation.
CW: R*pe, Trauma
“I didn’t think being at my parent’s house during quarantine would affect me so deeply. I’m trying to forget what happened, but it’s become hard to focus. Hotlines have long waiting lines because of COVID, and I’m scared to speak to friends because it means that I have to face it too. I’m scared my family might hear me talking to them, and I don’t want their shame or judgment.
It’s been years since the actual event, but I’ve never stopped and created space for myself to understand what happened… I was r*ped when I was in high school, and seeing remnants of my old room where it happened and photos of them made me fall apart. It hurts more to know that this was someone I once considered my closest friend. They were always the one to be there for me and came up with dumb adventures to cheer me up. In retrospect, that all feels predatory.
It’s hard to explain why you don’t want to sit next to someone when they drink orange juice. How do you casually say, “My r*pist always smelled like oranges because it was their favorite scent, so the smell makes me feel sick.” But now, I really like the smell of oranges, and that feels like a big victory even if I still have panic attacks from triggers sometimes. I’m really proud of myself for being able to share this, because it’s my first step in a long overdue healing process.” (Anonymous)
Identities: 1.5 Gen, Chinese/Filipina, Cis Woman
“While I was growing up, I remember playing with this white butterfly, calling it “bei yah” in Hokkien. My mother is half Chinese and half Filipino, and my father is fully Chinese, but we all lived in the Philippines together. After moving to America, I would still see the white butterfly. I used to believe that the same one followed from the Philippines to where I live now. It was a sign of comfort and familiarity in what felt like a foreign place at the time.
I grew up in a predominantly rich, white area of NY. I used to envy the privileges many people had at school that I didn’t have as an immigrant— parents were incredibly involved in their education, helping them every step of the way to ensure that they got into good colleges. There was this expectation that everyone goes to a private school out of state. At the time, I was immature, and was upset with my parents for not helping me the same way. I was worried that I wouldn’t match up to my friends who got accepted into Ivy League schools after deciding to attend Hunter for my scholarship. My parents worked every day as nurses, and I ended up taking on more responsibility, figuring things out by myself, and learning important life skills. But, I know now that it’s important to be grateful for what you have and to work hard and be practical to achieve the things you want in life.” (Anonymous)